For Anyone Who Has Ever Been Called "Fat"2:43 PM
Growing up I've learned to just ignore the people who have nothing nice to say.
I am called "fat" every single day of my life and I've learned to stop caring.
Let's backtrack a little.
When I was younger, I was a chubby little kid who liked wearing sleeveless clothes and short dresses because I thought they were pretty and looked nice on me. And I just felt more comfortable wearing them. People would tease me calling me taba (fat) but I didn't really care. But when I went through my puberty years, I stopped wearing dresses, and traded them for tshirts and shorts. Somewhere in my unconscious, I didn't feel that confident about myself because of my body type, even if I didn't admit it outloud. It was like there was this silent inner voice at the back of my mind whispering to me everyday that I wasn't thin enough to be pretty or nice.
I don't remember dieting or trying hard to lose weight. I wasn't even overweight in the first place. My parents were nice people and they never pushed me to do anything just because others told me to. But as I got older, I naturally lost weight and all my baby fat, and people started telling me "wow you've become so thin!" - as if it were such a good thing.
It might've been a compliment back then but to me now, when did being thin ever become a compliment? Isn't it just a word to describe a person's body type? And when did the word fat ever become associated to negativity? Fat or thin - these are just adjectives to describe. What did it matter if you were fat or thin? People came in all sorts of packages and shapes and sizes. What did it matter?
Now that I'm in my teenage years, I am 115 pounds, 5 feet 1, 28 inch waistline, a size 6, small/medium in clothing, normal BMI, generally healthy, and still, I am called fat. Even if I've gotten thinner compared to my size as a kid, it turns out I'm not 'thin' enough and I still have people pinching my arms or my tummy telling me "you're so chubby".
But do I let it get to me?
Looking back now, I think I was wrong to ever feel bad for being called fat by people --- because fat isn't an insult, even if people use the word to hurt people. It's just a word.
Why do people compliment a person when they get thinner, but shush quiet when they become fatter? Who ever said that being thin is cool and good and that being fat is gross and bad? Who makes these stuff up? Who sets the standard anyway of what is considered fat or thin?
It seems I have ended up with more questions than answers. But if there's one thing I do know now is to not let these comments get to me.
Because who cares what people think anyway? Some people are born with bigger bones, some are more petite, some have smaller waistlines, some have bigger hips - point is, some are just smaller and some are just bigger. I don't like it when people would think I'm such a better person because I've lost all my fat from when I was younger. I don't want people complimenting me about the weight I've lost. Let it be just that, a fact. I was fatter as a kid and now I'm thinner. Can't people just focus more on how I have internally grown up and changed and matured over the years? Not on what can be seen outside. And especially not on how I lost my baby fat.
Because here's the cold hard truth: Your body size is not indicative of your worth as a person. It is not indicative of your niceness smartness or even your future. Your body size is NOT a measure of who you are as a person inside. Your body size SHOULDN'T matter.
I look forward to the day when people will just accept that human beings come in different shapes and sizes, and that judging people just mirrors your own insecurities about yourself.
Scratch that. I look forward to the day when people will no longer have these insecurities that do nothing but destroy every piece of you.
Maybe one day the word fat will become just that. A word. Not an insult that cuts deep into people, destroying their entire lives and slowly killing every part of them until there's nothing left. Not a parasite that eats you and consumes every part of you until you slowly succumb to the pressure and you're just... gone.
And I will never wish that, not even to my worst enemies.
To all the people who feel insecure about their bodies, I'm telling you this: you're beautiful and anyone who says otherwise is lying.